My grandmother, Eldora Leaphart, was a
terribly interesting person. If you had
met her over the last few years as Alzheimer’s eroded her memory, you would not
have gotten a true sense of who she was.
How many people do you know that could stand on the seashore and get sea
sick, but be fine on a boat deep sea fishing? Why didn’t she learn to
swim? Because her father told her not to
get in the water until she knew how.
She wouldn’t see doctors (She
didn’t “go for that.”), she was “allergic to all medicine,” but when she was
told by a dentist that she might lose her teeth, she began a vitamin regimen
that cured her gums. Oh, and a couple tablespoons of sunflower seeds a day will
cure cataracts.
As I began my reflections about
Granny, I realized that many things that are true in my life I learned from
her. I do not want those life-lessons to be forgotten; so, I have chosen to
share some of them with you so that her lessons might live through others.
It’s
about People never Pretense -- Granny, as she was known by most people,
was WYSIWYG before computers created the term–
What-You-See-Is-What-You-Get. She had no
pretense, and did not dress nor act to please others. Until my mom absolutely insisted, I know that
Granny wore the same blouses that she had for 30 years. Even then some of her
clothes had to disappear before newer ones would be worn. Once she found a comfortable sweat suit, you
could just forget getting her to wear other clothes. Again, she didn’t dress for appearances or
for others, she dressed to be comfortable.
Any excuse to take a trip – She was always ready for
a drive somewhere. Some people saw
bills, Granny saw opportunity. Duke
Power? We need to drive to Piedmont. Oconee County Taxes? It’s time to make a
trip to Walhalla. There was always another person to see from Oteen to
Dacusville to Gray Court
to Lexington and beyond.
Variety can
be fun –
But she didn’t just drive any way.
Following in the pattern of her Aunt Jennie she never came and went the
same way on a trip. She loved seeing
different and new places – remembering who lived where.
Faster is
not always better – And when you traveled with Granny, she did not like to travel the
interstates AT ALL. She knew they might
be faster, but they weren’t better (and she would tell you so).
When you
go, take a friend – When Granny drove, she preferred to have someone with her. She carted us boys around more times than I
could count. As the grandsons grew
older, she developed groups of friends – most of whom could not drive themselves
– that she would take on her long adventures.
When I moved to Dacusville, I met a man named Emory J***. As we spoke, I told him about where I grew
up, but it was mostly small talk. When I
mentioned “Eldora Leaphart” his eyes widened with recognition. “Eldora used to scare me to death,” he smiled
as he told me. “Your Grandmother used to pick up my mom, Kathleen J***, and
they would disappear for the day. When
they got back, I’d ask her where they’d been, but she could only say, ‘ it
seems like we’ve been about everywhere.’”
If you love it, share it – Granny taught me that if
you love something, share it with others …that means everyone. An unsuspecting customer waiting to check out
at the store became the subject of a barrage of evangelistic information. No, not your normal tracts, but with
information about sun dogs (within 3 days there will be a change in weather),
kudzu (the young, tender leaves are best to eat), apple cider vinegar (with the
muther in it), Possum Pie (no, not any meat in it), Pinto Bean Pie (you can
make 3 for 1 pecan pie – can’t tell the difference), green lipstick (from
Wilson’s 5 and dime that turns red on lips and lasts all day), and so much
more. She delighted to share the things
in life that fascinated her, and she wanted you to love them like she did.
A pastor was driving through town one
day and stopped his car. He saw a little
lady in a white car flag him down. She
pointed to a bright, small rainbow in the sky.
“That’s a sundog,” she said. After
hearing Larry talk about Granny, the pastor told him, “That must have been your
mom.”
Extend an open invitation – She taught me how to be
gracious in extending invitations. "Come see me" were words that left
her lips near the end of every visit.
She invited children to come see her in a different way, sometimes
misunderstood. “I'm gonna take you home with me,” she would say. No, this wasn’t about kidnapping. She wanted all the children to know that she
really did want them to come and visit her house – and to stay a while.
Expect them
to come
– I learned that when you invite people to come, mean it, and expect that they
will visit. I asked her a few months ago
on a visit to her house, “Granny, whatcha been doin'?” Her reply? “Waiting for
you."
Be Prepared
to be Hospitable – If you invite people and expect them to come, be prepared for them.
Every Sunday afternoon, we knew that we would eat lunch at Granny’s house. We also knew that we were to bring anyone,
and I do mean ANYONE else that we wanted.
Many of our friends quickly became adopted grandchildren as they were
warmly welcomed at her table. If there
weren’t enough space at the table, she’d set the kitchen table. If there wasn’t enough room there, she would
pull out a folding table. Everyone always had a place at Granny’s table.
I’m
going to stop with this last thing.. in Isaiah 43 the prophet says…
But now, says the Lord—the one who created you, Jacob, the one who formed you, Israel: Don’t fear, for I have redeemed you; I have called you by name; you are mine.
With her Alzheimer's disease, Granny was remembering less and less. She called me George (we don't know a George in the family), and she called me Bill (her youngest brother's name). Last month, my mom asked if Granny
knew who I was. She looked at me and
said, “He’s mine.” She might not have remembered my name,
but she always knew that I was hers…
So many of us gathered over the last
few days to remember and celebrate her life. Through the years she called us by
name—we were hers.
Today, I am confident that God says,
“Eldora, I have called you by name; you are mine.” Love has now called her home.
May that same love which blessed so
many through the life of Granny live in each of you, and may you be a blessing
for the world today.
